Eric Lecarde breaks the head off of a giant, probably priceless, statue in Greece. (It was in the way.)
I miss soulless Sam sometimes.
i’ve never seen anyone shift to bitch face as quickly as sam does in that last gif
I KEEP WATCHING IT AND LAUGHING HARDER
what would happen if you got addicted to it. like you where in a tough situation and you started to use it more and more, until you never turned it off. then it broke.
Okay wait… story time…
This was literally required viewing in my squad when I was in Iraq.
My squad leader was this huge 6’4”, 240lb Ranger instructor, and he demanded that every one of his soldiers see and be able to quote passages from both The Labyrinth and Dark Crystal by memory. If anybody failed the chorus of “Dance Magic”, he’d have them watch the entire movie again when they were done with weapons maintenance.
He could also recite military literature and strategy dating back to ancient Greece. If you ever wondered why we moved in a specific formation, he’d be happy to give you an unabridged lecture. If he had faith in your mental capacity to understand it, he’d offer complete citations and required reading. The man had easily amassed the equivalent of a doctoral degree in military science, and he took pride in the craft of training his men.
He was also a competition body builder. He is a man whom I would feel very comfortable describing as one who could crush a (small) man’s head in a single hand. I once watched him squat his own body weight in full gear. He could stand out in the cold longer than anybody you’ve ever met, and even feral dogs grew calm in his presence (not shitting you).
We were short on chow once, so he went two days without food “because [his] men deserve it more.” He made sure he was always the last to fall asleep, the last to eat, and the last to put on “snivel” (aka: cold weather gear). He did this so his men could never say that we were tired, weak, or cold without admitting it to a man who had done more than us — with less.
Completely unrelated to that, I leveled up poorly once during an off-duty DnD game, for which he smoked me for the better part of 20 minutes. ”Ludwig!” He shouted, “What the fuck are you doing putting anything into intelligence for?! Your a level eight Monk! You need strength!” He had also accused me of meta-gaming, so he decided to make me do IRL workouts to make up for the point of strength I had failed to level up in-game.
He used to carry a (real) tomahawk holstered on his belt, and he had personally trained every one of our officers at Ranger School — though many of them were too sleep deprived at the time to remember. Regardless, he could shout “Hey Ranger!" to any one of them, and you’d see them go from a confident commissioned officer to a terrified boy right in front of your eyes.
36 hours into a non-stop counterattack on our outpost in the middle of Sadr City, he calmly strolled into my firing position and offered me a “Ranger cookie”. As he explained, all you have to do is tear open the dried creamer packet, pour in some sugar and instant coffee, fold the container shut, and cook the packet over a lighter. He even gave me a demonstration — right in the middle of a firefight.
One day, during training, one of our mortar-men was having trouble adjusting fire (they have to do short-hand trajectory calculations on the fly in the field). My squad leader took a knee and explained the entire concept of external ballistics and forward observation as applied to high-arch projectiles. He made on of the finest mortar-men in our company that day.
So after all of that, it was no surprise that over the course of his many years on this Earth, this man could verify that he had slept with well over 100 women — each one a beautiful, self respecting and confident specimen of humanity, who (aside from a handful) had parted on good terms, with no ill will between them.
I knew this man as “Staff Sergeant Benjamin.”
Nay have a met a scholar, a mentor and a gentleman with such character as he.
Sergeant Benjamin is a legend to all those who know him. He is a man who should have been born a thousand years ago, yet graces this Earth today. I am honored and proud to know that men like him continue to serve in our military (despite all the bullshit going on).
Somewhere out there, I can only hope that he might find the beautiful death that he deserves.
(Oh, and I guess David Bowie is pretty cool too….)
War. Science. Muppets. Baking. Role playing… Poetry.
Deleted scene from the critically acclaimed film, Gravity.
oh my god, you tried
According to the Internet, this is what Europeans think breakfast in America is like.
this is exactly what breakfast in america is like
This is breakfast in america like supertramp.
she wants the c*
*(c stands for “Cardassian Sex Tricks”)
i promise u will not regret these 11 seconds
i have no regrets
neither did ron
The best of Ken M
Corgnelius forgot how to dog.